The
European Coaching Institute
Keeping you informed with each other
August 2004
ECI
Coaching Top Tip


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The six mistakes of human kind
  1. The delusion that personal gain is made by crushing others
     
  2. The tendency to worry about things that cannot be changed or corrected.
     
  3. Insisting that a thing is impossible because we cannot accomplish it
     
  4. Refusing to set aside trivial preferences
     
  5. Neglecting development and refinement of the mind, and not acquiring the habit of reading and studying
     
  6. Attempting to compel others to believe and live as we do.
     
Cicero, Roman Statesman 2,000 yrs ago

Day in the life of ……….. feature

If you are a specialist coach who enjoys the benefit of working in a niche market, share your experience with us.

Send us your ‘day in the life of’ story.

We are also looking for:

Relationship coaches in Sept
Financial coaches in Oct
Career coaches in Nov
Performance coaches in Dec
Attitude coaches in Jan 05


Send us e-mail


What the media is saying

?

Have you heard something we haven’t previously mentioned? Then help us to keep colleagues informed; tell us and we’ll tell everyone through the newsletter.

Alternatively, maybe it was you who featured in the news? Share your success story with us by sending us an
e-mail


A study conducted for NEC-Mitsubishi concludes that cluttered desks contribute to Irritable Desk Syndrome. 2000 employees were interviewed;
  • 40 percent said they were infuriated by cluttered desks but couldn't be bothered to do anything about it
     
  • 35 percent said they had neck or back pain from sitting awkwardly.
Maybe you feel the same about your car, your house or your cupboards?

Nigel Robertson, Deskologist and leader of the study recommends

‘Don't endure, act today, and don't wait for someone else to fix it for you.


Ice-breakers

(Great for workshops / training to create a safe / fun atmosphere)

I hear and I forget,
I see and I remember,
I do and I understand.


Confucius .


Chocolate Mathematics
  1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate. (try for more than once but less than 10)
     
  2. Multiply this number by 2 (Just to be bold)
     
  3. Add 5 (for Sunday)
     
  4. Multiply it by 50 I'll wait while you get the calculator...
     
  5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1754.... If you haven't, add 1753
     
  6. Now subtract the four-digit year that you were born. You should have a three-digit number. The first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week). The next two numbers are .........YOUR AGE!  ~  ( Oh YES, it IS!!!!! )
THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS


Our Deepest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light - not our darkness - that most frightens us. We ask ourselves: Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel unsure around you.

We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us. It is in everyone.

As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear our presence automatically liberates others.

Marianne Williamson


Offers

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Biofeedback

You've probably heard of biofeedback, in which you are trained to learn how to relax by getting feedback via sensors attached to your fingertips or in a band around your head. It's a great technique but some of the equipment is expensive.

Since your heart rate is a pretty good indicator of your level of relaxation, I've hit upon a cheap and easy way to do the same thing: use the kind of heart-rate monitor that people use at gyms (Polar is one of the main brands, but there are also less expensive ones).

You put a strap around your chest, and your heart rate is indicated on the matching wristwatch. When you relax, your heart rate goes down and you see it instantly.

ACTION: If you've been meaning to learn how to relax, this is a quick and easy way to experiment with what thoughts (or sounds, or images) help you to do so. Most fitness equipment places sell the equipment.

Jurgen Wolff
Author of Do something different
E-mail him
Visit website


Features in forthcoming newsletters

Sept: 
Relationships & communication

Oct:
Opening your coaching practice

Nov: 
Coaching as a career

Dec:
Create solutions not resolutions in 2005

Jan 05:
Positive Mental Attitudes (PMA) and time management

E-mail us

If you are interesting in flexing your creative writing muscles, then we’d like to read what you’ve got to say (approx 500 words, copy deadline 15th of each month).

All contributions are welcome and will receive a response.

We are currently seeking contributions on the following subjects:
  • Time management
     
  • Attitudes to I.e. money
     
  • Corporate coaching / case studies
     
  • Laws of attraction
     
  • Dealing with bullying
     
  • Learning to say no assertively
     
  • Transition from life to executive to corporate coach
     
  • Public speaking
     
  • Networking 
     
  • Relationship articles about siblings, business partners, romantic partners, dealing with children, parents – especially yourself!
     
  • Dealing with difficult people
     
  • Assertiveness skills
     
  • Listening skills
     
  • Delegation, motivation, negotiation skills
     
  • Confidence tricks
     
  • Flirting tips
     
  • Work life balance - putting career or family first?
     
  • How to win friends and influence people
Other coaching / self-development ideas very welcome!

E-mail us

Be your own best client

Take the quality of life check test. How many circles can you tick?
  • Am I taking extremely good care of myself?
  • Do I take time out of my schedule every week just for me?
  • Does my schedule reflect my priorities?
  • Am I tolerating any person, place or thing that is draining my energy?
  • Am I living within my means, saving and investing consistently?
  • Am I fuelling my body, mind and spirit with premium sources of fuel?
  • Am I strengthening my soulful connections with important relationships?
  • Am I consistent with my spiritual practice?
Index of Items
Editor's Comment:
There are 168 hours in a week. How many do you spend on yourself?
Dawn Campbell
Time is finite. You only get a certain amount – 168 hours a week, fifty-two weeks a year and that’s it if you’re lucky. Time is a gift that most of us take for granted. It is a myth that we can somehow manage ‘time’. The truth is, we can only manage ourselves. So let’s make it count.

During the summer some of you will be unwinding and looking for new ways to re-charge your energy levels. Others will be taking advantage of this seasonal ‘down time’ for bi-annual health checks on life, business and finances.

A lack of financial reserves is often the biggest obstacle to living the life wanted. Restoring financial health begins with a shift in attitude, changing beliefs about money, asking for help, knowing where the money goes or investing in the future.

Maybe you’re going to set some new goals? Well if spending more time with yourself and self-improvement are some of your goals, this newsletter is for you.

This packed August Health Special newsletter comes to you courtesy of many accomplished coaches, experts in their chosen field. So prepare to be enthused because this month the focus is on YOU.

In the words of Gandhi who said, There is more to life than increasing its speed, this is your opportunity to learn to relax and change any self-limiting beliefs you have about the importance of putting yourself first.

Research shows that people who work in care or people professions live longer and are more fulfilled. I’d like to think that’s true. All year long coaches make it their business to support, challenge, heal, guide, inspire and motivate others: clients, friends and family. Now it’s your turn to indulge in some precious ‘me’ time.

You could start by looking at what drains your energy? Because every action you do or don’t do uses energy. What you may not know is that actions you don’t take also deplete your energy – mental energy, emotional energy, energy that could be used in a more positive way.

Stop and think about the amount of energy you have at the moment. How much do you need in your life right now? What have you been meaning to do but keep putting off? What needs to be resolved? Do you need to forgive someone (even yourself)? Is there a relationship that needs mending or ending?

Make a list of all the things that are draining your energy and think about why you haven’t completed these things before now. Choose the top ten things that are draining you that you want to concentrate on and assign a time frame for completing these issues – allow a realistic time i.e. 30 days depending on what needs to be done.

Think about how much more energy you will have and what you can accomplish when you eliminate all the things that distract or drain your energy.

Now, sit back, put your feet up, read on……….and remember; the most important things in life aren’t things!

Or in the words of J Paul Gettys brother who sent J. Paul a haunting letter headed: "From the wealthiest man alive, to the richest."  His point was to remind his brother that all the money in the world could not buy happiness, love, or peace of mind. Now there’s a thought!

Dawn Campbell
Head of Newsletters


Send your questions, quotes, case studies, articles, tips, feedback and queries, acronym’s etc to
newsletter@the-eci.org
NLP and Physical Health

Many people are aware of the benefits of a positive mental attitude, statistics show that optimists have a greater survival rate than do pessimists from potentially fatal illnesses; the unconscious has greater control of the body than a dying breed of orthodox minds would dare to admit. Many people practice yoga or meditation etc. and would agree that a healthy mind will help toward a healthy body. As NLP practitioners we have a valuable ability to communicate on a deep level with unconscious facets of the mind, what exactly can be achieved with this skill in terms of health?

Well, if NLP provides us with tools to communicate with the unconscious and to affect certain unconscious processes, let us peek into the field of spontaneous remission. A particular story of Mr. Wright immediately springs to mind. Mr. Wright had been diagnosed with multiple cancers, he was bed-bound and was not expected to survive more than a few days. He pleaded for a new drug named Krebiozen he had heard of, which his doctor reluctantly prescribed, knowing in his heart of hearts that it would not work.

To his surprise he returned to the ward Monday morning only to find Mr. Wright was out of bed, walking and talking about leaving the hospital ten days later. Mr. Wright went on to find out that Krebiozen was useless, suffered a relapse and died two days later*. This is one case, though tragic, among many unexplainable and rather baffling healing effects that some scientists, researchers and myself, believe demonstrates the raw strength of healing potential in the unconscious mind.

How then, does one tap into such unconscious resources? It is a very experimental field though many wonderful discoveries have been made, and many using various NLP methodologies. You may be aware of techniques for allergy/eczema cures, creative visualisation strategies or the idea that ‘the body cannot distinguish a real event from a richly imagined one. The fundamental requisites for an allergy cure are that one finds and anchors a non-allergic reaction and then continuously triggers it whilst imagining being exposed to the allergen, the end result being a newly established learning that helps the body to act more appropriately. Such techniques are intriguing as they offer us a very unique insight into the way that the unconscious learns how to order and organise the processes of the body and how we can play an active and involved role if needed.

NLP Reframing has also proved useful in reprogramming less useful unconscious behaviours; in fact, the field is so vast and fascinating that I can only provide an introduction to it. The ideal is for a person to approach the concepts with a sense of adventure and exploration, to learn from and converse with others and to begin to just try things out. Mild allergies are a fantastic starting point. I began by rounding up all my friends who now used to suffer hayfever. I hope that as you consider these words and start exploring and experiencing the benefits of NLP techniques applied to physical health that you enjoy the journey.

greencow_555@hotmail.com

*The full account of Mr. Wright can be found at -
www.users.bigpond.com/paulfran/dr_bernie_siegel.htm
There’s More To It Than Meets the Eye!

I was introduced to House of Colour, surprisingly, by my husband about 10 years ago. It was one of those big ‘0’ birthdays and he handed me an envelope, (trip to Paris, shopping in New York?). Ripping it open only to find a Gift Token for House of Colour – Colour Analysis, Image and Make-up sessions. I was less than pleased! At my age surely I knew which colours suited me, how to dress and make-up. However, being a present, I dutifully booked.

Having dark hair and eyes I always dressed in autumnal colours. At the Colour Analysis session I was astounded that the moss green I loved actually made me look drab, in fact older. The sharp bright colours of what I later found to be the Winter spectrum, scarlet, electric blue and emerald green made my skin clearer, younger and my eyes brighter. As for burgundy, charcoal and pine green, they looked fantastic, making me smile when I saw them against my face! It was like magic, I felt great!

More revelations were to come. Being a classic pear shape (or so I thought), I would never wear straight skirts because I thought they made my hips look big and lived in baggy jumpers to hide them. The image class taught me that I had a small waist, not big hips and should be wearing clothes to accentuate this asset rather than hiding it! Having a basically straight body I should be wearing straight skirts! I was also given an individual assessment to find the clothes and accessories that best suited my personality – yes it was true, I was dressing like Cinderella - all floaty, unconstructed, flowery styles - instead of the Snow Queen I really was, needing constructed, dramatic, clean lines.

The make-up completed the reinvention of the new me. This whole experience totally changed the way I felt about myself. Once I started to change the colours, shapes and style of clothes I wore I immediately felt more confident. Compliments flowed; I lost ‘pounds’ and grew ‘inches’. I was a new person and felt great inside as well as outside.

Sessions are much more than finding whether you can wear pink or blue! They help you to discover your best assets and how to show them off instead of hiding your faults – something we all do! Body language naturally improves because you feel more balanced, confident and credible. You interact better with other people because you dress ‘who you really are’ instead of getting dressed to ‘look like other people’ which may be less believable.

10 years on and I am running my own consultancy, showing both men and women how to make the very best of themselves. Little did my husband know what he started when he gave me, what I now know, was a great, life-changing present.

jwallace@houseofcolour.co.uk
www.houseofcolour.co.uk

©2004 – Jane Wallace
Fearless Living - Extract from An Interview with Rhonda Britten

Rhonda is an author of 3 books including Fearless Living and Fearless Loving, and now Change Your Life in 30 Days.

Change Your Life in 30 Days is a book designed to be a tool and skill-building book. Each day is focused on a particular skill to build your awareness. As you and I both know, awareness is critical for change to happen. This book is designed to increase your awareness, while helping you incorporate new skills through asking you thought-provoking questions as well as giving you an assignment that can be integrated into your day and your life. 

The point is that if you want accelerated growth, and if you want to make real change happen quickly, and I think a lot of people do, these are the 30 qualities or skills that I think you must have if you're going to be the person you yearn to be. 

How did you arrive at these 30?
They're themes that keep coming up for all my clients, whether they're with my show 'Starting Over' or whether it's my private client practice or through my work training coaches. For instance, people always ask me about balance, motivation, and passion. So I have a chapter called 'Forget Motivation'. And some people believe the world is against them. That is another chapter, 'For or Against.' They think they're optimistic, but when you break down their language, they really do believe that there are people or a person that are subtly harming them, or are giving them permission to blame themselves or another. I'm going to take all those excuses away from you, and build your own level of awareness so that you can take back your life. 

What's your opinion on a 30-day blitz versus a 6-month program? Can anyone benefit from a 30 day intensive, or are some people suited to a more sustained approach?
A lot of people love 30 days because they want instantaneous change. Change Your Life in 30 Days is languaged like a result book, when in fact; it's really not what you think it is. The subtitle says it all: The Journey to Finding Your True Self.

People are going to pick up the book thinking, 'Okay, I'm going to get that new job in 30 days' or 'I'm going to fall in love in 30 days'. All of that can happen, but it's going to be from a cellular level rather than an intellectual level. The 30 days can turn into 6 months, that's fine. You have to take it at your own speed. 

You and I both know as coaches that you can sometimes go 3 weeks without hitting a wall. Well, great, you get up to day 21 and then you'll hit it - fine. It doesn't mean the book's not working; it actually means the book is working because you're hitting the wall. So whether you complete the book in 30 days or 3 months or a year, it is designed to serve you.

And it would seem to me the authenticity piece, your true self, is essential for any lasting change. 
Yes. Most motivational and self-help books are too geared to results. I named it as a result book, and yet when you start reading it, you think, 'This is deeper than I thought!'

Are there segments of the book a coach might use in their own practice?
What I invite every coach to do is pick up the book and go through the program themselves. Do every exercise, read the questions, answer them for yourself - use it as a workbook. Once you start doing that, you will have certain sections or certain days or certain questions that really resonate with you. It's chock-full of exercises and questions that will help you become a better coach because it's going to broaden, and or deepen, your horizons. 

We're all trained in how to help somebody find their purpose, but this is not the normal purpose conversation that I'm going to have with you. It's not the normal 'rah rah' intuition conversation, so you're going to be going to a deeper level. It's going to make you a more subtle, more effective and more profound coach. To really help a client understand it, we have to be willing to embody it ourselves. 

And we may not be perfect at it - it's the practice, the willingness to work with it. Once you're working with it yourself, working with a client is going to feel more effortless and you will naturally integrate what works for you into the coaching practice you already have. 

www.FearlessLiving.org

©2004 – Rhonda Britten
Health is the first step to self-development

Are you the healthiest person you know? If you are a life coach, presumably you need to be and know enough to be able to explain health in a broad way. People like me come to people like you for direction. If you or a client has to cope with aches and pains, allergies and restrictions, if we feel bitter, angry, resentful, if we cannot get out of bed in the morning, how on earth is it possible to go beyond ourselves and wake up our potential?

These symptoms are indications of imbalance and will lead to more serious situations later in life, yet we can redress the balance, it is not magic or quantum physics, although that obviously plays a part!

Whilst the nature of health is complex and individual, there are fundamentals, which are straightforward and apply to us all. Ideally we would live in a lush world of plenty, clean pure water, richly oxygenated air, food full of life giving energy to feed every cell in our body and toxins few enough to be neutralised, excreted or rendered harmless by our micronutrient intake.

Every toxin within has to be dealt with by the micronutrients from our diets and it uses vital energy, both of which add further to our depletion. Toxins include yeasts, moulds, fungi, bacteria, viruses and parasites that are living and as such steal foods and deposit gunk in our systems. Dark rings round the eyes, headaches, tiredness, allergies are the result.

In this modern world where we are overloaded with toxins and starved of micronutrients the imbalance is tangible. However, thanks to the findings of biochemistry and microbiology, it is a situation we can reverse.

Avoidance of toxins is the first priority. Throw out all your bathroom products and cosmetics unless they are free from toxins, the most notorious being sodium lauryl/laureth sulphate, propylene glycol, alcohol, fluoride, aluminium, talc, lanolin, mineral oil and petroleum (anything from the petrochemical industry), anything leading to DEA and TEA contamination, perfumes, even the most expensive seem to contain toluene and benzaldehyde, to name a few. The list is vast and as Prof Samuel Epstein* states “no matter the dilution, there is not such thing as a safe carcinogen”. Check out your own products.

Unless your household cleaners are 100% biodegradable, they will contain ingredients known to government as “hazardous waste”. Do not forget that everything we use goes down the drain into our water system – we drink it and it contaminates (as is evident from fishes to polar bears whose very genders are mutating).

Other ways you could improve your health may include installing a reverse osmosis filter system in your kitchen. Chlorine and fluoride are potential carcinogens. Water supplies in this country, contrary to those of Europe, are increasingly being fluoridated. Hormonal residues from the Pill and HRT are not filtered out by water companies. Our bodies are 70%+ water and the message is to drink 1-2 litres a day of water to rehydrate and flush out toxins (coffee, tea, fizzy drinks, alcohol do not count and even act as diuretics). Reverse osmosis removes all impurities from heavy metals to bacteria and parasites. Freshly Squeezed Water is available on a rental basis, which equates well with buying bottled water, which has its own problems, not least xeno-oestrogens in the plastic bottles! It is easy to install and can move home with you.

If you use a mobile phone consider using a magnet to absorb the waves. Apparently if you surround an egg with mobile phones, presumably switched on, the egg would cook quickly!

Buy organic where you can. Chemicals deplete the soil, deplete vitamins and have contributed to the frightening loss of minerals from the soil (over 70% in the last 50 years alone), yet minerals are the raw materials of life, every function within the body as well as the uptake of vitamins, enzymes, amino acids etc depend on minerals. Chemicals, early harvesting, long storage, transport, light and heat, refining and food processing also contribute to the vitamin destruction, and an orange loses 5% vitamin C daily. Heat and cooking also destroys enzymes.

It is essential to supplement our foods with a full range of macro and trace minerals (ensure the heavy metals such as aluminium, cadmium, lead, mercury etc are removed). For good absorption they must be colloidal, ionic and plant based. If your digestion is effective, if you are not carrying too many toxins and parasites, you should absorb an incredible 80-90% of these. You also need a very effective, broad based antioxidant with vitamins A, C and E but also other ingredients which are known to be far more powerful to deal with free radical damage, known to contribute to degenerative disease including cancer, heart, diabetes, arthritis.

Essential Fatty Acids are particularly important in the Omega 3 chain notably from oily fish. Even if you are vegetarian, consider taking this as vegetable sources are not quite the same, but make sure any toxins such as mercury have been removed! Of course be wary of farmed oily fish unless they are organic.

Oxygen is vital to cell regeneration. In the 1800s the atmosphere contained 38% oxygen and 1% carbone dioxide. Today it is 19% oxygen and 25% carbon dioxide. You can add oxygen drops to your water, which release a single atom of nascent (negatively charged) oxygen, which also cleanse the water and help scavenge free radicals (which are positively charged atoms). Cancer and other illnesses thrive in anaerobic conditions.

Undertaking the above will help our very fine pH balance or acid: alkaline measure. We are far too acidic. Toxins cause the acids. Eat as much organic raw, green vegetable as you can, these are detoxing and help alkalinity.

Companies with safe products are coming to the market. For details contact
j.singleton@virgin.net

*Prof Samuel Epstein, Chairman of the Cancer Coalition (www.preventcancer.com)

©2004 – Jane Singleton
The loneliness of the long distance coach

If you’ve been used to working as part of a team, it can be a bit of a culture shock when you first start up in business as a coach - and not always in a good way. Suddenly, your colleagues (where you can find them) are virtual ones. Even your clients may be only familiar voices, if you do mainly telephone work. And your boss is the person looking back at you in the mirror.

All this freedom can be joyous if you’ve been feeling constrained by office life. But once the novelty of coming to work in your pyjamas and taking the afternoon off when ever you feel like it wears off, the reality of being a solopreneur may not be everything you dreamed off. It’s hard to have a chat around the water cooler when you’re the only one there. And when you want to brainstorm and bounce ideas off a colleague, it falls a little flat when that colleague is the dog.

When I run my media training courses for coaches, the purpose of the workshops is to teach my colleagues how to attract publicity for their businesses. But one of the surprising side benefits of these courses has been bringing people together who are from the same profession but who generally work alone. People who’ve never met before greet each other like old friends because their names, if not their faces, are familiar to each other. It seems to come as some relief to find that yes, it’s not just you who struggles with marketing, and yes, there are other people facing the same challenges you are too.

So if you’re feeling isolated, what can you do about it?
  • Join and regularly attend your local coaching group. If there isn’t one, start one up.
  • Join an online discussion group for your profession to meet like-minded people.
  • Take time each week to meet up with a friend or meet someone new.
  • Talk to your neighbours and get to know your local community – remember that networking doesn’t only happen when you have a plastic name badge pinned to your lapel.
  • Join a business networking group
  • Attend courses you’ll enjoy and which might attract people you’d like to connect with.
  • Develop interests outside your business. Fascinating though coaching is, you will start to bore everyone (including yourself) if this is all you have to talk about.
  • Make the most of the benefits of working alone and remind yourself why you chose to do it in the first place. And if working alone turns out not to be for you, give yourself permission to change until you find a working style you can look forward to every day.
info@joannemallon.com
www.medialifecoach.com

© Joanne Mallon 2004
A day in the Life of a Health Coach

Your optimum health is so important. Caring about yourself and your health on a daily basis really will assist you in living a longer and more productive, joyful life!

I arise early with the sun, but I do go to bed early so that my mind and body get enough rest. This way I recuperate and wake feeling fresh enough to jump out of bed. After a short time I meditate and speak out-loud my affirmations and prepare my food for the day to some inspirational music.

I have found that to eat a healthy balanced diet every day, requires the preparing of my food first thing every morning. I have a salad for lunch along with enough fruit, vegetables, and nuts and seeds to keep me going through out the day.

Living on an ‘organic’ fruit and vegetable ‘living food’ diet 99% of the time takes planning. I do also supplement my diet with a good multi-vitamin and mineral ‘capsule’ (not tablet, for easy absorption), and I also use omega EFA’s for my brain and a lot of vitamin C (6,000mg + a day), as I do exercise a lot.

After a few small pieces of fruit I take some exercise. Exercise or activity is essential for the brain to be activated. The reticular activation system, (a lower part of the brain stem) requires movement to activate the brain and for consciousness and the ability to be, and to stay alert, to be activated. The growing trend of morning coffee is a ‘quick fix’ to force the body to wake up with adrenalin, which ‘shocks’ the brain into gear, but in the long-term this is not a healthy option.

Without daily exercise I put on weight, so I apply self-discipline Monday - Saturday and exercise every morning. This helps me to stay lean all year round and keeps my body-fat low. This keeps me light on my feet, my productivity is always high in my work time, furthermore, my all-round energy when I am socialising always seems to be high, and I seldom get tired.

I work diligently throughout the day. I stay centred on the task at hand, and make sure that I am at my best for my clients. I am conscious to take small breaks throughout the day if I feel I need to, this ensures that I am ‘stretched’ and not stressed out!

Science has proved that 3 factors are extremely important for a human-being to stay in, or to obtain optimum health:
  1. Your environment: your place of work, relationships, etc.
  2. The amount and type of exercise you choose to partake in
  3. Your diet is also extremely important
I love my work, assisting people to grow as a Coach is an incredibly satisfying career and helping people to re-focus on their health, sits with my value of caring with compassion for people. My work time is extremely busy, but I also make sure that I take time out for fun and play, to keep my heart as young as the child inside of me. As a Coach I am aware that balance, really is important for my health too.

As my work time comes to an end I always give myself ‘switch off’ time before going to bed. Although I am, at this time, already looking forward to waking up to start work again tomorrow.

Right now I am involved with an exciting new health programme. THE MEANINGFUL CHANGE WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAMME which has been developed with the professional input of over 20 Professional Coaches and a faculty of 20 experts which include: an Exercise expert, a Nutritionist, a G.P, a Yoga expert, a sleep expert, a Chef, to name just a few.

The focus of this programme is to assist people to lose weight once and for all! Being overweight really does affect your self-esteem, your confidence and your entire life. Indeed, choosing to lose those unwanted lbs. is a goal that really will lengthen your life!

I was overweight until I committed to working with a Coach. I tried diet after diet, nothing worked for me until I got the professional support I needed to change. I’ve never looked back. I hated being overweight and needed to change for my health. Today of course, I help other people to improve their own health! How is your health?

 - www.europeancoachinginstitute.org

©2004 – Anthony Aurelius
Lose the fear – life is huge!

Power is of two kinds. One is obtained by the fear of punishment and the other by acts of love. Power based on love is a thousand times more effective and permanent then the one derived from fear of punishment. Mahatma Gandhi

When we are young, we live our lives mostly without fear. Of course, we are scared by small things: spiders, television characters; sometimes the dark, yet we live our lives wanting to try new things and that is how we learn.

As we grow older the fear increases, and the number of things we fear and become apprehensive of grow too. We start to worry about perceived dangers such as trying new sports, embracing new routines or ideas or even talking to new people.

If only we could hold on to the freedom that we have when we are children, our lives would be more enriched and rewarding to us.

I recently read a wonderful book about life in Canada in wartime. One of the characters was remarking how she used to walk in the remote parts of Canada, alone in the bush, for weeks at a time without concern. But then she got old and started to believe what she was told about going out – she was told repeatedly to be careful; there was always something out there to get her. Then she stopped walking and lost her power.

So how does this fear set in and what can we do to expel it?

Well as in the case of the old lady, our parents, our schoolteachers, our peers, our siblings and friends influence us. We are told to “be careful” and this instantly instils a fear in us subconsciously. Be careful of what? What is out there to hurt me? Little by little we begin to believe those who care for us and whom we respect and we stop searching for our power and stretching ourselves mentally and physically.

These are limiting beliefs and if we can learn, at any time of life, to let them go and understand that there are no boundaries to life, we can live much larger lives. By taking small steps each day to lose the fear, this may be climbing a tall hill, taking a flight, joining a class, driving across the country, we make ourselves stronger by realising how powerful we are as human beings.

As the old lady says “Go out into the bush and find your own trail. There is something out there to get you, know that, but don’t be scared. Go hunt it down, so it don’t get you.”

Take a step today towards losing your fear.

rosie@rosiewyattcoaching.co.uk
www.rosiewyattcoaching.co.uk

©2004 – Rosie Wyatt
Who’ll Hold your Hand, while Building your Brand?

If you can imagine, for just a moment where the word ‘branding’ came from – it was the mark that was seared into the skin of an animal with a hot iron, so that the world would know whom it belonged to.

Branding yourself need not be as painful, but it is nearly as important. Your Brand IS your mark… so that when recognised is associated with you. And the whole world knows it.

But Branding is not necessarily just about your identity & logo. It may encompass your name, your tagline, your graphics and printed material - but it’s far more than that. It’s the essence of ‘who, what and why you exist as a business’ – what you ultimately STAND for. By telling the world these key aspects, they have no doubt about what to expect from you. If you live up to these expectations, you will have happy client/customers and happy customers mean referrals. Your branding starts with the impression people get when they first meet you.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression!!

In reality, you get approximately 7 seconds to make any kind of impression at all. That is all it takes for someone to decide that your identity is a bit dated, your card looks a bit weathered, and your suit a bit rumpled. So branding is not only about the funky logo or company name, it’s about the non-verbal communication that we experience in everything we do and see.

As coaches we are constantly seeking out the values, which our clients hold most dear – the things that drive them to achieve their goals and outcomes. Values are no different when it comes to what’s important to you and your business – you just have to show it!

In the good old days, we used to think that good branding was equal to good business or high quality. These days, good branding is only equal to the marketing budget that has been allocated to it (think Nike)! But good Branding need not cost an arm or a leg. Go to someone who can help with your branding – whether it’s a new look for your business cards, website, office document or office space – what they’re looking for are those values that you hold most dear about what’s important to you in business. Ensure that the people you choose to work with really understand what your values are and are willing to work with you around creating an appropriate Brand that fulfils these values.

The key to branding - without a doubt – is consistency. No matter what you do, make sure your Branding is consistent. Does your brochure reflect your mission and vision for your company? Does your website match your business cards? Does the content on your brochure match the content on your website?

As an interesting Branding exercise, elicit your values around what is important to you about your company. Prioritise these values in order of importance - of the top 4 values on your list – what images, colours, sounds, objects are evoked by the words you have chosen to make your key values? Consider collecting images – from matchboxes to magazine graphics – that visually portray what you feel your business ‘STANDS’ for, cut them out and keep them for when you’re ready to look at your Brand.

lisa@pennink.com
www.pennink.com

©2004 – Lisa Penn
Image - 90% of us will decide what we think and feel about someone in the first10 - 40 seconds of meeting them.

In an ideal world, if you are good or even excellent at what you do, then surely what you look like, what you wear, how you behave and the manner in which you speak should not matter one iota? Unfortunately, that is not the reality. Ninety percent of us will decide what we think and feel about someone in the first ten to forty seconds of meeting them. During that process we will make between 23 and 27 sub-conscious decisions about that person, based merely on their appearance.

Research has given us some clues as to what we will base those decisions on. In part, the results have shown that 55% of those decisions will be based on visual impact. As a personal effectiveness coach, I am often asked to address the issue of the image of a key individual in an organisation or a team of people, particularly those who interface with the public, and sometimes even the image of an entire organisation.

Sales people are the main players in promoting the key messages that any organisation wants to present to their customers, clients or the public in general, regarding their identity, ethos, services and products.

I was recently asked to coach the London sales team of a 5 star international chain of hotels who, according to their sales director, were not portraying a professional image. It was an interesting challenge with a multi-national group of people working in a strictly British environment and selling to both the corporate and private markets.

>From a coaching perspective I decided to adapt the simplicity of the GROW model to move the team towards what they wanted as individuals, as a team and the organisation as a whole.

We started off with a general discussion on the overall issues, the perceived image of the organisation, including the effects and mixed messages that may result from cross-cultural differences. The group then set well-formed team and realistic personal Goals.

When the Reality of their current professional impact and potential turnover was discussed, many (male and female) members of the team recognised that they might not be portraying the five star image of the hotel. In particular, they agreed that it was mainly in relation to the way in which they dressed, the consistency of their overall grooming and general attitude.

Once this had been established, they were enthusiastic to work on a list of all the aspects that they wished to address regarding their professional image - all their Options to achieving a more powerful, positive and professional impact when meeting clients, customers and future guests of the hotel.

I was then able to work with each team member on an individual basis, covering the ‘rules’ of professional dressing, the language of clothes and British dress and corporate culture. On a personal level we looked at what would suit them in terms of the cut, shape and style of their clothes, the power of colour, their body language, rapport and meeting skills. Once their actions were given a time scale, the When of the model was achieved.

anthea@yarney.freeserve.co.uk

©2004 – Anthea Yarney
What Keeps You From Living Your Dreams?

Albert Camus, a famous author and philosopher, once applied names to previous centuries. He named the seventeenth century as the century of math. The eighteenth was the century of physical. The nineteenth was the century of biology. Then, he shocked the public by naming the twentieth century the century of fear.

Along with this bold statement, came that of philosopher and poet, W.H. Auden. He called our time, “The Age of Anxiety.”

Newspaper columnist Ann Landers was once asked, “Out of all the thousands of letters you receive each month, what problem is most dominant in people’s lives?”

“It’s fear!” she replied without hesitation. “People live in bondage with their fear. They’re afraid of losing their wealth. They’re afraid of losing their loved ones. They’re afraid of being themselves. They’re afraid of growing up and being responsible. They’re afraid of life itself!”

In all the personal coaching clients I work with, I hear about how they, too, had to face and deal with their fear. What I began to notice is how similar the stories were! I came to understand this profound truth:

The difference between mediocre success and a breakthrough success is your willingness to face and deal with your fear.

When your fear is exposed, you break its control over you. The reality is, fear was never intended to dominate your destiny or control your behaviour. FEAR IS HUMAN. It is in every person’s life, exists in every success story, and is part of growing. Fear isn’t going away. It’s not fear that keeps you from success. It’s your inability to deal with it.

The first step in dealing with your fear is to change your beliefs about it. Every person has fear. The successful have learned to befriend their fear. They don’t react in their fear. They act in it – walking through their fear.

Every person has the same weapon to help them act in their fear. Every person has the gift of faith. The way to befriend fear is to neutralize it with its opposite – which is faith. Is your faith stronger than your fear?

Where faith is dominant fear is silenced. Faith is like a multivitamin on steroids! It is faith that fosters hope, courage, boldness, and conviction.

Even the medical community recognizes the power of faith. It applies to parents doing all they can to raise healthy, happy kids. It applies to spouses trying hard to keep their marriage alive or even keeping it together. Faith applies to professionals working to build their business. The bigger the goal - the bigger need for faith.

Well-known author, Max Lucado, explains faith in the following story:

Imagine that you are an ice skater in competition. You are in first place with one more round to go. If you perform well, the trophy is yours. Then, only minutes before your performance, your trainer rushes to you with the thrilling news: “You’ve already won! The person in second place can’t catch you. You are too far ahead.”

Upon hearing the news, how will you feel? How will you skate? How about courageously and confidently? You will do your best because the prize is yours!

Live your life like you’ve already won. Walk into that job interview like you’ve already got the job. Ask that girl out on a date like she’s already said yes. Ask for that sale like you’ve already made it!

Albert Camus, W.H. Auden, and Ann Landers exposed our fear. Fear exists. But you can conquer fear and neutralize its power by cultivating your faith. Have an assurance of things hoped for and a conviction of things not seen and you will create hope, boldness, and courage, and begin living the life you dream of.

www.rx-success.com/store/richkit.html

©2004 – Lisa Jimenez
7 steps for emotional well being and vitality

1. Develop passion and compassion
It is a short life and it is your life. It is also a gift. Get excited about it. Seize the day and seize the moment. You have a talent that is unique and special to you. Nobody else has this talent and expresses it as you do. Ask yourself what is it that when you do it you lose all track of time. For this talent there is a need. Who you are and what you do matters. Remind yourself everyday.

Resist the temptation to exploit any current beneficial situation to the detriment of others. You cannot manage alone and remember in the simplest form we are all in this thing together and are infinitely connected. Be kind to yourself and then offer the gift of you to others. Offer your kind words, your support, your friendship and your smile.

2. Ponder your attitude
Think about how you feel. How you feel is up to you. You can choose to be happy. You can choose to be content. You can choose victory over failure. You can choose a positive attitude. If someone upsets you and you get offended it is still a choice to be offended. Shift your thinking from “what’s in for me” to “how may I help”, and develop an attitude of gratitude. If you can read this you are better off than 90% of people on this planet.

3. Spend time with yourself
Spend a little quiet time with yourself each day. Spend a little time with nature watching a sunset or next to the ocean and witness yourself in this moment. Notice how it feels and observe the miraculous. Review your value and your values. Coach yourself in self-improvement by reading a little philosophy. Frequently ask yourself the question “who am I” and remember the answer is always the same “don’t know”. Try and learn to meditate.

4. Understand the concept of Karma
What you sow is what you reap. Your thoughts, your words, your deeds explain where you are right now in life as a consequence of previous choices. It is time to think about choices that bring success and happiness to you and to others. When you bring success and happiness in this way the benefit to you will be reciprocated in kind. Be generous with your thoughts, your feelings and your time. Think about when you have previously made a decision based on love. How uplifting was it?

5. Let go of fear
Fear is utterly destructive and often used to manipulate you. Whenever anybody tries to use fear as a motivation, turn around and walk away. Fear creates anger, resentment, and blame and limits your ability to think clearly. Beware of the fear of fear itself.

6. Take responsibility
People who believe in themselves take responsibility for themselves. Others will blame their troubles on someone else and in doing so hand over control of their lives to others. Have a willingness to believe in yourself and take responsibility. When you do this you are a success. Nothing can make you a success if success is not inside of you.

7. Smile
Don’t worry. Be happy. Today’s small problems will be tomorrow's chuckles and sources of inspiration.

Have a great, happy, healthy and prosperous month.

www.tom-lambert.org

©2004 – Tom Lambert
12 Secrets to Staying Young
Make yourself accountable
Debate - Do coaches need therapy?
Book Review

Therapist As Life Coach

- Patrick Williams & Deborah Davis

Aimed at "helping professionals" this is an extraordinary book that belongs on the shelves (and in the heart) of every therapist AND every coach. Williams and Davis do a great service for mental health workers, counsellors, social workers and Psychologists by affirming the power of what "we" do, and by expanding the boundaries within which we operate. At the same time, they also provide a great reminder for coaches of what WE do, how we do it, and how powerful it is!

The book is elegantly laid-out, easy to follow and powerfully practical. The heart of the message is that caring for and WITH people truly matters. Whether we are labelled "mental health practitioners" or "spiritual ministers" or coaches, we all use sophisticated skills, some that are ancient and timeless, and others that are new and scientifically "proven," to help people transform their lives.

The book was a passionate reminder of what coaches actually DO! While this is an introduction or over-view of coaching, the reminders and affirmations were extremely helpful. As "people experts" it is good to be reminded of how much we know, how skilled we are, how many "tools" we have in our toolbox!

You can purchase it from The Institute for Life Coach Training by clicking here or, Amazon by clicking here
The Fence – a lesson in anger and forgiveness

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail Into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.

Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there. " A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.

Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us."

Show how much you care. Send this to everyone you consider a FRIEND, even if it means sending it back to the person who sent it to you. If it comes back to you, then you'll know you have a circle of friends.

Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole in your fence.
Change your life in 28 days

Week 1: Be happy today!
Before you start fretting about what is going to make you happy and healthy for the rest of your life, focus on what's going to make you happy NOW! Stop focusing on the big picture and start cleaning up the details of your life. Details generally occur in the present and you can do something about them. Take 3 actions per day for the next 7 days that will improve your life instantly - from having your hair cut to hiring a cleaner.

Week 2: Figure out what is draining your energy
Putting up with rubbish in your life holds you back - be it needy friends, the junk in your cupboards or the junk food in your diet, it's time to get clear. Stop wasting your life trying to manage situations that shouldn't be there in the first place and you will have more energy to devote to the quality of your life. Make a list of at least 21 things you are tolerating in your life and over the next seven days - blitz that list.

Week 3: Get more than you need in every area of you life
What do you need more of in your life? Time, space, money, energy, love? Figure out what you need to be happy and healthy, and then double it. Over the next 7 days plan a way of getting it - whether that be sitting down your loved ones and asking for support or scheduling in three nights a week where you do nothing but lie in bed and read trashy novels. By building reserves of time, space, money and energy into your life, life becomes easier because you're driving on a full tank rather than an empty one.

Week 4: Get to the root of bad behaviour
Trying to change a bad habit such as smoking or overeating by developing more self-discipline rarely works because bad habits can simply be symptoms of a bigger issue. This week, commit to doing whatever you have to do to get to the root of the problem once and for all - whether that is booking into therapy, counselling, hiring a nutritionist, chef or life coach!

Coach@philiphumbert.com
www.philiphumbert.com
Do you have skeletons in your closet?

Of course you do; we all do.

I'll define a 'skeleton' as anything you've done in the past that you feel was wrong, feel bad about, would like the world not to know, or are still hiding. 

Let's start with the easy ones... Q. What do you regret, but have never apologised for? Q. What are you still carrying guilt about?  Q. Who do you never want to bump into, because you feel uncomfortable about something? Q. Is there something you are worried someone might find out some day? 

Exercise
Think about it - absolutely anything about you or what you have done that you are hiding? I invite you to pause now for 5 minutes and make a list.  Trust me - it will be worth it. 

Now before we jump into how to free yourself once and for all from these 'skeletons', let's go even deeper so we cover everything. 
  1. Have you ever stolen something that was never publicly known?
  2. Have you had an affair that is still secret?
  3. Are you terrified people will find out you are gay?
  4. Did you ever take advantage of someone?
  5. What lie did you tell that has not been found out?
Only you can know what you have been carrying around - let's add it to the list.

And I promise you - no matter how small or how big, you CAN be free of it.

If I look back at all my skeletons in the past, I was afraid of being made fun of, being yelled at, being bad mouthed in public, being embarrassed in front of a group, being ostracized by society, and even going to prison. I invite you to write down right now the consequences you could face by getting free of this skeleton or weight. It's a critical step on the way to moving through it.

Tell the truth to the person you most fear telling.  In fact - that's how you know they are the right person to tell.  Because that's where the fear lies that stops you soaring in life.  That's your demon to confront before you may grow.

Yes - this is a radical approach. Many people die with their skeletons, and with the heavy fear of being found out.  However, if you are extraordinarily bold, if you decide that living with your head held high and the peace of true integrity is more important than anything else in life....

If you choose to risk the consequences - if you choose personal freedom over fear of consequences, then pick up the phone and come what may.

WARNING: While the consequences are often pleasant, this can in no way be guaranteed.  The whole point of this is you may face some unpleasant consequences - which is exactly WHY you've been hiding it.  Some of the worst things I can imagine are: you could lose for example your partner, your family, your business, your life, or go to jail.  If cleaning this up could have legal consequences, I recommend consulting a lawyer so that you know what you are dealing with, then you can make an informed choice.

If you find it too big to clean up right now - if the fear has too great a hold on you - bear in mind that this can be handled a couple of ways: It can be over in 5 minutes from now - or it can be a process over a number of years. 

Perhaps today I've planted a seed in you that will grow with time.

davidt@lifecoachingresource.com
What is the real nature of self-sabotage?

Homoeostasis is defined as:

n. automatic maintenance by an organism of normal temperature, chemical balance, etc., within itself. homoeostat, n. machine capable of same kind of self-regulation.  

Think of yourself as the ultimate homoeostat. Boy, are we human beings great at staying the same! Physiologically and psychologically we have many systems designed to prevent us from changing. Physiologically we maintain our blood sugar, temperature, weight, calorie intake and many more potentially reactive systems from an unconscious centre.  

Psychologically we do exactly the same thing. Change means danger to our psyche/ego and must be avoided at all costs. The greater the change, the greater the perceived danger, and the greater the defensive moves. We will, albeit unconsciously, sabotage any attempts to make a major change.  

To overcome this need to stay the same, we must align the brain with the heart and soul! To coach change without producing self sabotage we need to be strong, edgy and aware. We need to watch for the patterns and coach beneath them rather than ask the client what they need to “do” differently.  

We can only grow as far as our self-image permits. It is our current limit and we need to work with it to prevent the self-sabotage. If we work at a behavioural level with clients then we think of procrastination as a behaviour. I invite you to drop the notion of procrastination being a behaviour and see it as a powerful tool employed by the self-image to keep us the same.  

What is below the procrastination?  

Low self esteem? Maybe they don’t believe they are up to the change? Maybe they believe they are too old or not qualified enough?  

Unconscious values clash? Maybe they have a strong value around freedom and are scared that the promotion they really want will mean, “so much money they will have to stay forever” (I have heard that lots of times).  

Unmet needs? If someone is desperate to fulfil a need for security they are most unlikely to manage to leave a corporate job they might well hate in order to create a business they know they would love!  

Beliefs about the process? So many people run strong stories about things that “should” be done. They want fun and freedom from earning more money but believe that wealth creation is hard work and demanding!  

All of these will result in self-sabotage usually in the form of procrastination – the inner conflict becomes an outer tantrum!  

Look for where you appear to be procrastinating and, either alone or with your coach; look at what is producing that behaviour? What is beneath the apparent inability to take action?  

A final thought – if we know there is a brick wall somewhere on the road ahead we hold down our speed just in case we come across it. We don’t put our foot down and hope we see it in time to stop! The same is true with these unconscious blocks – when we know albeit unconsciously that the blocks are ahead, we put our foot on the brakes now (i.e. procrastinate/self sabotage).  

Coaching’s greatest gift might well be in supporting people to take the foot off the brakes.

lisa@prosperitycoaching.com
www.prosperitycoaching.com

©2004 – Lisa Wynn

scroll down for rest of newsletter – some how it got detached and I can’t put it back together……….
Don’t allow yourself to wilt under worry, fear or guilt

To worry is like rocking in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but gets you nowhere.
   - Unknown

Heal the child within

We all set off in life with balance. Worry, guilt etc are uniquely human inventions and learnt behaviours. They ALL prevent freedom. Some levels of each are normal. However, significant issues need to be resolved. Deal with the cause by changing your thoughts / actions. The first positive thing to remember is that these behaviours can also be unlearnt by changing your state of mind.

Damaged Self esteem i.e. you are insulted

Recovery techniques;

Understand why the jibe hurt you in the first place. It normally stems from wounds you received in the past during a time when you lacked confidence – what made you feel lacking in confidence? If you secretly fear the slur is true, this relates to your insecurities now - deal with them by listing them – choose to change or accept them. Next, focus on the insult, when and where it actually happened so you can see it has no relevance to your life now and remind yourself just how far you’ve come since then. Then think about what was actually going on in your life when you felt self-conscious, block out the negative thoughts and think about how you dealt with the situation.

Fear

Fear is a feeling. Feelings give rise to thoughts and thoughts give rise to actions. Therefore, fear is very real to the person who is afraid. Fear is not a character defect. Being brave does not come from lack of fear; it comes from taking action despite fear. Fear is normal and is split into 3 main categories:
  1. Fears based on things that happen i.e. accidents
  2. Fears based on things requiring action i.e. public speaking
  3. Ego based fears i.e. failure
It all comes down to a fear of the unknown and fear of change.

Recovery techniques:

Appreciate the value of mistakes and learn by them. Understand that fear is ‘yesterday’. Be in the present and your mind will clear. Monitor negative self-talk, fear is not in things, fear is in the meaning you give things and vanishes when you re-interpret your perceptions and thoughts. Whenever you feel fear, ask yourself ‘is this fear a fact or is it just fear?’

Guilt

Guilt stems from the past – you can’t be guilty about something, or someone in the future. Guilt is real but has no logic. So guilt is historic and is based on a past experience.

Recovery techniques:

Identify, challenge and accept your guilt then acknowledge and accept that you acted and behaved in a way you NOW know to have been wrong. Realise and accept you did what you did because of the situation you were in and the beliefs you held at that time. Forgive your actions and make amends (it’s never too late). Use affirmations, meditation and goal setting to break guilty thoughts.

Worry

Worry only exists in the mind of the worrier, it is a thought process: You cannot hold it, taste it, smell it, and hear it or even touch it – only think it. Therefore, its important to acknowledge that whilst worries are real and have their origins in the mind, they tend to manifest themselves in physical symptoms in the body i.e. stress.

Despite knowing that ‘worry solves nothing’, we do still worry. There are only two reasons for worrying:
  1. You can worry about yourself
  2. Or someone (or something else)
Also, there are only three things to worry about:
  1. The past
  2. The present
  3. The future
Recovery technique

Think through the ‘what if’ scenarios. Worry about other people means there’s something missing from you own life – ask yourself why and what? Reduce the number of ‘things’ that could potentially cause you worry – especially inanimate objectives. Fear of the unknown is typically the most common worry. Remember, some events are totally beyond your control, which means you shouldn’t waste precious energy worrying about them as they may/not happen anyway. Worry about the future is often about the unknown. It you are worried about a future event within your control, define the worry and explore the action you can take to secure the outcome you want.

Anger

You have the right to be angry. Anger is not wrong, it’s just not your best choice and if we’re honest, anger does not really work, it’s just a form of control and tends to be a defensive feeling to hide other emotions like guilt.

Recovery technique

State what your grievance is. Ask yourself is it true? How old are these feelings? Ask how you behave when x happens? Turn the grievance around and see who’s responsible for what. Work out if these feelings serve your best interest?

Inevitably the answer is ‘no’ and the answer reveals another way of looking at the issue without blaming the other person for your feelings.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness takes you beyond your own ego and offers insurance against bitterness, resentment, premature ageing, cynical rot, heart disease, an unhealed past and an unhappy future. It switches fear to love, pain to peace, past to present, despair to freedom.

What will your legacy be?

More of the same or something you’re truly proud of? Take a few minutes to look into the future and look back on your life, what does the picture of your life look like? What are you proud of? What will your legacy be?

Copyright
2004 dawn@rainbowpromise.co.uk

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches - Anon
How to act yourself into health, wealth and wisdom

“I’ve just been diagnosed with cancer and I’m going in for surgery,” my sister said on the other end of the phone.

My mind was reeling. I clutched the phone, took a breath, and tried to speak. But before I could say a word, Renee began telling me survivor stories and the actions they took to fight cancer and win.

For the next 20 minutes she narrated survivor story after story and how she is implementing in her own life what each of the survivors did.

Today, Renee is completely cancer-free and is one of the survivors she studied and talked so much about. I believe Renee became a survivor the day she decided to ACT like one.

It’s the same for you and me. We become an entrepreneur when we decide to ACT like one. We become a multi-millionaire when we begin ACTING like one. We become happily married when we ACT like one. We become a great mother or father when we begin to ACT like one!

I read an article in Psychology Today that reported a study done about human behaviour and success. The people in the study who experienced the greatest – and most rapid – success were the people who changed the way they behaved. In other words, they “acted out” the results they wanted. The conclusion of the study was:

“People don’t think their way into positive actions as fast as they ACT their way into positive thinking.”

What about you? Do your ACTIONS look like they belong to a person who is healthy, wealthy, and wise? Or do they look like they come from a person who is sick, bankrupt, and dense?

You’ll stop thinking small when you stop acting small. You’ll begin thinking big when you start acting big.

Let’s say you want to become a millionaire. Begin by making a list of behaviours that you believe exemplify millionaires. Ask yourself:

How do millionaires walk into a room? How do they greet people? Introduce themselves? Treat their spouse or children? How do millionaires dress? Shake people’s hand? Get into and out of a car?

When you can answer the question, “How do millionaires behave?” and then begin behaving in that manner, you will ‘ACT’ yourself into positive thinking and increase your chances of attracting opportunities that will ensure you become a millionaire.

Here’s the fascinating part…

It doesn’t matter if the behaviours you think millionaires have are true or not. It only matters that they are aligned with your values and that they are YOUR beliefs. When you begin implementing these actions something triggers in your subconscious that YOU are a millionaire.

Can you see how repetitive, daily actions of what you believe millionaires do will connect YOU and MILLIONAIRES?

Create your list of behaviours of the healthy, wealthy and wise. What behaviours do millionaires have? What are the behaviours of happily married people? What are the behaviours of healthy people? What are the behaviours of great mothers and fathers?

Begin implementing these behaviours in your every day life and you will ACT your way to success!

www.RX-Success.com

©2004 – Lisa Jimenez
ECI Up-date


ECI Workshops and Events

Grow Your Practice, Part 1 - presented by Curly Martin

date:   Tuesday 14th September
venue: Central Park Hotel, Queensway, London
costs:  £12.50 for members and accredited coaches
           £17.50 for non-members.

All workshops are from 7pm to 9.30pm (local time). To be included, email workshops@europeancoachinginstitute.org with your name, address, email address, and telephone number.

Further dates for the ECI's workshop programme are:

12 October 2004
9 November 2004
9 December 2004
11 January 2005
15 February 2005
15 March 2005
12 April 2005
17 May 2005
14 June 2005

For more details see our coaching calendar!

Offers and Articles

The ECI continually strives to improve the services provided to our Members, our Accredited Coaches, and our Accredited Training Providers. Therefore when we receive an offer or an article that looks interesting, we are happy to pass it on through our newsletter.

However, we are unable to try out everything we receive, so welcome your feedback about the offers and articles.
The
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